i woke up at 9.30am. everybody here thought i would wake up only after lunch.
they were shocked upon seeing me walking down the stairs. bloody hell!

auntie ivy and uncle pai hwa needed to go bank, and they dropped me at 1utama.
yes, i shopped alone! ):
i happen to saw cousin alice while shopping, she went shopping during her lunch break. (i totally forgot that her office was near that shopping mall.) she accompanied me till 2pm and she went back to her office.

uncle pai hwa called me and i went over to meet them. we went home to put down our shopping bags and hit the supermarket to get the ingredients needed for our christmas party at home. the supermarket is damn huge! it's like three times of dawson! i'm a good girl, i didn't lay my hands on anything there. uncle pai hwa spent more than RM900 in that fucking supermarket. the turkey itself cost RM200. -__-

anyway. not my money. i was thinking "lucky we brought the maid along." if not, i doubt we can handle so many things. we went home after that. it's tedious. we walked around there for almost 3hours.

uncle pai hwa went out again together with cousin john and his wife, sharon to go 'shop' for car now. LOL. he's thinking of changing his old car. rich fella. -__-

oh, i thought asking for a Coach wristlet or a Ralph Lauren Romance was too much. but guess what?! cousin joseph asked for a new phone that cost RM1000+!!!!!!!!!! WTF?! what's worse is uncle pai hwa just smiled. so i guess i'm not asking too much! (:

i'm waiting for cousin alice to come home! ):

auntie ivy asking me to try a wine that auntie chris brought here. then, prepare for dinner that's reserved at 8pm.

later!

i'm in KL now. it was a very last minute decision.
up till now, i think there are only a handful of friends know i'm out of town.
wahahahahahaha! but i made an effort to text my friends before i left my house.

i just got home from some place. i had bottles of beer with my daddy. does it sounds weird? LOL! we even talked about making profit in business, like we use money to make money. KNN! i feel like an auntie for a moment. after that, we went to check on his workers at some shopping mall. he gave me RM200 to buy whatever i want in Cold Storage. (go supermarket need so much money meh? some more only for myself leh.) i spent less than RM50 and pocketed the rest. LOL!

currently, i'm stuck with a piece of paper that my uncle ask me to list down what i was for christmas, and it's still blank.
seriously, i'm so tempted to ask for a vaio since my acer is in terrible condition, but i just can't bring myself to ask him for that though it's actually peanut to him.

you know my pride doesn't allow me to do such a thing, and moreover, in their eyes, i'm a girl that actually go for labels. (it's totally not true lor!)
honestly, how many times a year they seen me? so how well can they actually know me? TSK!

mommy constantly reminded me last night never ask for expensive gifts from uncles/aunties.
so i was thinking if Coach wristlet and Ralph Lauren Romance consider expensive? LOL!
but i've seen my cousin's list leh. it's all above RM150. she had four choices and i only had two.
i even asked her what's his budget per person and she said uncle never mention about budget. TSK!

actually i'm satisfied with little gifts that if they made the effort to choose the presents. like the little magical candle that crystal gave me yesterday when i went panjang to meet her, it's already so heartwarming. she even bought it in my favourite colour! i took pictures of it last night, but cable is upstairs. too lazy to actually walk up the stairs again. LOL!

end of that topic.

i sent a message to mommy this morning tell her i'm in the coach already. she called me immediately telling me to take care and be a good girl. out of the sudden, i feel that i'm still so dependent on her like a 2years-old girl.
i want to buy the DVD of this korea drama in KL, but before that i asked mommy to buy for me and she rejected me flat. but she told me over the phone not to buy it, she will get it for me. i almost cry hearing that. not because of the DVD, but because i felt the love she have for me. why she only talk to me so nicely/sweetly/gently when i'm going outstation or vice versa?! -___-

i wonder if sissy, ikssy and minmin is on the way home from my house now? normally at this time, me and mommy will send them to the doorstep and watch them walk to the lift. i really miss ikssy a lot, a lot. will he still remember me after 11days not helping sissy to take care of him? ):

I MISS MY MAMA! T_T

p/s: daddy say he will get me a new laptop after he get bonus. but he said no vaio, so too bad! ): actually i like vaio because it's so pretty! LOL! probably getting a HP? Fujitsu? Toshiba? O.o?

at sissy's place now. both ikson and sissy is sleeping soundly.
and i'm feeling bored!!!!!!!

laptop is in the service centre for repair.
after february, no more warranty! ):
i can't wait to get back my laptop!!!!! T_T

i'm feeling hung hung~! >.<

when i fall asleep, the urge of puking comes.
i can't rest at all, not that i don't wanna rest.
uncountable episodes of diarrhoea and i need to plus my toes to be able to count how many times i vomited.
this feeling sucks like hell.

is diarrhoea contagious? or i'm down with gastric flu again?
i feel so wobbly now.

i need to puke again.

i hate 2009! i really hate 2009!

i just brought grandma home from SGH.
it's a long story, tired of elaborating because i've been repeating to almost everybody at home.
hahahahahahahahahahahaha!

i still can't sleep because i need to make milo for grandma at 11.30am.
it's stated at the plastic that she can only consume the medication half an hour before food.
she got no appetite to eat, so make her a milo will do.
nobody is as filial as me, i reckon. hahahahahahahaha!
that wu jia ming say will go fetch grandma with me, end up sleeping like a pig.
then his wife send me there and left me there to settle everything myself! TMD.
i still bring her home myself leh! but she's my grandma, so forget it. hahahahahaha!

one of the male nurse called me at 9.30am to inform me that my grandma can discharge.
when i reach there, i walked into the critical care room like an idiot not knowing what to do.
then i asked somebody, and they ask the nurse who is in-charge to guide me.
he said he's the one who called me earlier, and he's fucking cute/handsome!
he still joke around with me and when i thank him, he said softly "so cute". hahahahahahaha!
i wanted to tell him "you are even cuter!" hahahahahahahahaha!

okay, i'm mad.
cool down. just a guy, no need to react until like that.

i doubt i'm able to sleep well. grandma needs me to take care of her.
she even ask me to cook porridge earlier, i was like "HUH?!" hahahahaha!

by the way, yongchen is an idiot.
he said: "you never sleep then go hospital. i think you also can stay there."
TMD! sway mouth!

Infant/Toddler Care & Development Course or Early Childhood Care and Education?
which one? which one?

sissy says she will take up the course with me.
i should work and save money first la.

fuck! i keep saying i wanna work, but then like no action leh. LOL!
not much motivation leh. i also scare to be alone ):

p/s: why do i miss you out of the sudden?

cousin eugene passed his TP yesterday.
TMD! when wil be my turn ar?!?!?!?!?!
i also want to say proudly and confidently: "byebye to trips to ubi. byebye to one hour of driving. byebye to 'L' plate."
i'm fucking devastated! T_T

also, i need to work real soon.
at this rate i'm going, i'm as good as a good-for-nothing.
i shouldn't waste my life away like that.
there are so many/better things for me to achieve out there.
i'm fucking demoralised! T_T

in conclusion, i think i've got no time/not ready for a relationship now.
should i or should i not let go?
i'm fucking confused! T_T

heading to crystal darling's crib together with jurvia later.
at least one thing that cheer me up (:

i need to shut my system and go into a coma once my food in cafe world is ready to serve.
goody night/morning!

oh, fuck!
i'm down with bad sore throat and flu.
i sense my 'friends' are all coming back one-by-one.

i really need to work badly. oh, fuck fuck!

can i go back to those days when i just need to sit down and play my barbie dolls with own imaginations? need not worry about such irritating issues.

arrrghhhh, fuck fuck fuck!
life is so unfair!




sometimes it's easier to say that you're fine instead of having to explain all the reasons why you're not.

i feel like giving up, honestly.
everything seems so meaningless now.
i can't force myself to do things against my wish.
but some say i'm stubborn and some say i'm having too much ego.

i thought we live for ourselves, not for somebody else?
but why people give me comments like as if i'm being myself is wrong.

maybe i was wrong right from the start.
maybe i shouldn't even agree to this relationship
maybe because i wasn't totally ready at all.
maybe i'm neither the right one for you nor you are suitable for me.

probably, this is what i call fate.